What’s in your cup?

Enjoying a bit of downtime between Christmas and New Year I came across a post talking about this analogy;

You are holding a cup of coffee when someone comes along and bumps into you or shakes your arm, making you spill your coffee everywhere.
Why did you spill the coffee?
“Well because someone bumped into me, of course!”
Wrong answer.
You spilled the coffee because there was coffee in your cup.
Had there been tea in the cup, you would have spilled tea.
Whatever is inside the cup, is what will spill out.
Therefore, when life comes along and shakes you (which WILL happen), whatever is inside you will come out. It’s easy to fake it until you get rattled.
So we have to ask ourselves… ”what’s in my cup?”
When life gets tough, what spills over?
Joy, gratefulness, peace, and humility?
Or anger, bitterness, harsh words, and reactions?
You choose!


This New Year I took the time and to read my last three years goal setting and action workbooks.

Over this time period, I have intentionally set out to “fill my cup” with various community involvements and personal development.

I celebrated my successes but it was also apparent some goals were set year after year.

New Year’s resolutions were clearly not working for me!

This year I reviewed the previous year and contemplated all the things that had gone right for me then I considered all the positive things I would like to experience the next 12 months.

I put pen to paper and focussed on setting intentions – focusing on what I wanted rather than didn’t want.

We can set all the goals we like but it is our intentions that create our reality.

Everything is created twice – first in our mind then we live it out so we need to examine how we talk to ourselves, the things we say and challenge any limiting beliefs we may have.

After an epic year landing my dream job and beginning a new relationship, I was blindsided by finding out my youngest was self-harming.

I had thought the divorce certificate that arrived in the mail around my birthday meant freedom and the end of a dysfunctional and abusive period of our lives but his stepfather games were toxic and fucked with her head as she came to terms with the perceived rejection.

Life shook me and anger and bitterness spilled out – I knew it was time to refill that cup!


  • It is my intention to be free of the consequences of that relationship and accept that him leaving can no longer hurt me or my daughters.
  • I trust that everything comes at the perfect time.
  • I am receptive to limitless possibilities.
  • I intend to trust the process of life.
  • I maintain an attitude of appreciation.
  • I let go of expectations.
  • I find the extraordinary in the ordinary.
  • I embrace imperfection.
  • I accept support.
  • Motivation catapults me towards my goals.
  • I will have a healthy relationship with my body, mind, and soul.
  • I intend to pay more attention to my health and how I’m caring for myself.
  • I will inspire my creativity by reading more books.
  • I intend to remain open and receptive to opportunities for meaningful contribution.
  • I intend to be of service to others.
  • I intend to feel more love in all aspects of my life.
  • I intend to nourish my mind, body, and soul.
  • I will attract success and abundance into my life.

My next “knock” I pray that it may be a little bit of peace and humility that spills out!


Mai i toku ngakau,


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